So much is going on right now...it can be really really stressful. I am going through things emotionally, mentally, and physically. The one that bothers me the most is the emotions-and no I am not PMSing :P..perhaps I will explain later. Anyway I have sooo much homework to do-yes I should be doing it right now instead of writing this. Exams start next week and I haven't finished the semesters work! What makes me mad the most is the fact that I have had my SCC ISU done for ages, but haven't been able to print it off, and he won't accept it otherwise. If I can't get it printed I will be fucking screwed. Next semester I will have to work really had to get my average up or there will no chance in hell of getting into University this fall. Maybe I wasn't meant to go....but if I don't get accepted I will look like a failure and I couldn't handle that either. I have no clue what I want to do with my life which makes the situation worse, well at least when you have a mind like mine.
--On other news I think I will be doing a 12 week type boot camp to get my weight down a bit. It was in the Feburary issue of 'O', you know Oprah's magazine. I originally saw it online. She wrote a bit about her commitment. Her views were rather close to mine. She nailed it when she talked a bit about living behind a veil. Thats what I am doing right now, it is what I've been doing for ages. Not being who you can be.
--This year is also prom...I think I mentioned it before? I dunno, anyway for some reason I am excited. I am never excited about these things. It shouldn't be a big deal, really it isn't. I think it will be a great night to hang out with my friends but I kind of want a date which I dunno if that is a good or a bad thing....again I won't go into great detail, or some issues or jealousy might come up which i also won't explain. I don't have the heart to share my emotions and feeling with others and won't chance writing them down. For example I accidently brought up I liked someone with a friend, and trust me it was a tragic event for myself. Is liking someone really that bad of thing? It is to me apperently. I don't know why. Maybe I am afraid of liking someone that much or even possibly loving someone so I shut the ideas or possible feelings out. I feel like I should be in like grade 10 and having the whole crush thing going on. Not now *rolls eyes* it is pathetic. Lol, perhaps I shouldn't approach it that way.
--Anyway I should get doing my homework. I might even pull out one of my tapes and watch a few epd. of Most Haunted. I love that show. Too bad I haven't been able to watch it for awhile. Thank goodness its on again next week on W Network! I really miss having the old times when Jason, Phil, Rick *blushes :P*, Craig and all them were on the show. And I still haven't gotten my phil whyman autograph :(. Oh on another note I should be getting my books by Derek Acorah (the spiritual medium on MH) soon! Yay!!!!
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